9 Habits of Highly Successful Leaders: Self-discipline is Key

In the realm of leadership, the distinction between a good leader and a great one often boils down to a single, pivotal quality: self-discipline. Leadership starts from within—before you can effectively lead others, you must first lead yourself. In this post, we explore how self-discipline leads to the courage, consistency and commitment needed to persist through challenges and inspire others.

The makings of a good leader may seem elusive. When I reflect on the exceptional leaders I have encountered, a handful of essential qualities immediately spring to mind—integrity, vision, communication, adaptability, and empowerment. These traits may seem like innate gifts or distant aspirations, but I can attest from my own journey and experience as an executive coach that they are skills we can cultivate through dedication and effort.

Much like building a muscle, leadership capacities like strategic thinking, public speaking, and conflict resolution can be strengthened over time by doing the reps. This means that a key ingredient for unlocking your leadership potential is not some unattainable dream characteristic, but rather good old-fashioned self-discipline. 

The Essence of Self-Discipline

Often overlooked, self-discipline forms a silent force behind achievement. It's not flashy or sexy. It's getting up day in and day out and doing what needs to be done. It's the ability to push through excuses, rationalizations, and justifications that hinder action.

Discipline causes short-term discomfort but long-term gains. Conquering urges leads to positive outcomes later on. Persisting through the initial pain and resisting instant gratification play a key role.

As Ryan Holiday points out in Discipline is Destiny, this requires toughness. That's how we endure, sacrifice, and persist through challenges. This toughness stems from a steadfast commitment to our goals despite obstacles.

What does the science say? Self-discipline involves the prefrontal cortex of the brain. Neuroscientists have found that when people exercise willpower and delay gratification, there is higher activity in this region, which is associated with executive functions like planning, focus, and impulse control. Strengthening self-discipline leads to stronger neural pathways in the prefrontal cortex over time.

At the heart of self-discipline lies self-control. Roy Baumeister describes it as the "queen of all virtues," a strength that underpins all others. Without self-control, our thoughts and actions are not truly our own. Mastery of oneself, as Leonardo da Vinci suggests, is the highest form of power.

How To Build Self-discipline

Self-discipline is a learned skill, not an innate trait. The following habits contribute to building self-discipline.

  • Willpower—use it or lose it. Even though some people may be more naturally inclined, the ability to resist impulses and temptations can be developed through practice. Using willpower strengthens self-control like a muscle. Any use of willpower will boost overall self-discipline. This is why I love taking cold showers in the morning.

  • Take action. Brian Tracy, in his work No Excuses!, encapsulates this idea by urging individuals to take responsibility for their actions, emphasizing that "If it’s to be, it’s up to me!" This mantra serves as a reminder that success and progress are the fruits of action, not excuses.

  • Focus on the process. Thomas M. Sterner, in The Practicing Mind, highlights the importance of staying focused on the process rather than being overly fixated on the outcome. This shift in perspective fosters patience, increases confidence, and eliminates stress, making any task manageable and any goal attainable. Just be present and rock what you're doing—it changes everything.

  • Keep motivation top of mind. Motivation plays a key role. Feeling motivated, such as sensing a reward is coming, can boost willpower and self-discipline.

  • Optimize goals and planning. Having clear goals to work toward and organizing tasks helps marshal self-control and make better decisions aligned with objectives.

  • Remove distractions and temptations. Creating an environment conducive to your goals supports building disciplined habits over time.

  • Find your passion. The concept of "blissipline," as coined by Michael Beckwith, marries the joy of pursuing one's passions with the discipline required to achieve them. It's a state where discipline leads to freedom, allowing individuals to pursue what they love with vigor and dedication.

  • Practice. Practice. Practice. Treat goal achievement like training. Show up for deliberate repetitions of the process you have established with the intention of reaching that specific goal.

  • Leverage consistency. Consistency amplifies the effects of self-discipline. It's the daily commitment to action, to improvement, and to excellence that transforms potential into reality. In Take the Stairs Rory Vaden describes the "Rent Axiom," reminding us that success, like rent, is due every day, and it's through consistent action that we achieve our goals.

One Key Lesson About Self-Discipline

In our efforts to get up and do what we set out to do everyday, it's easy to fall into being a slavedriver, with strict rules, no flexibility, losing the deep drive, internal guidance and alignment with personal principles.

I recall very vividly a phase in my martial arts practice when I lost my motivation. It was hard. And painful. And I hated every early morning training session I had committed to. My practice slumped. I made no progress despite the hours put in.

And then I realized that my daily practice had to stem from an inner desire to do it, not from my self-critical voice of judgement and all those outside "should's." This may sound insignificant, and yet the shift is profound. And my progress soared.

Osho, in The Book of Understanding, echoes this idea: “I am not against rules, but the rules should arise out of your understanding. They should not be imposed from the outside. I am not against discipline! But discipline should not be slavery. All true discipline is self-discipline. And self-discipline is never against freedom—in fact, it is the ladder to freedom. Only disciplined people become free, but their discipline is not obedience to others: their discipline is obedience to their own voice. And they are ready to risk anything for it.”

Final Thoughts on Self-Discipline and Leadership

The path to becoming a great leader is paved with the stones of self-discipline. Scientists have shown self-discipline:

  • Can be learned and strengthened through practice

  • Taps into brain functions like planning and impulse control

  • Is boosted by motivation

  • Leads to achievement despite short-term discomfort

Developing discipline little by little creates significant lifestyle changes.

So make a commitment to self-leadership, find the courage to face challenges head-on, and the consistency to act daily towards your goals. As an executive coach, I can help you do this. Reach out for a strategy call now.

By mastering ourselves, we unlock the door to not only personal success but the ability to lead others effectively. In the words of Lao-tzu, "He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still." This mastery is not just about adhering to external rules but about listening to and following our own inner voice, a discipline that leads to true freedom and, ultimately, to effective leadership.

Enjoy the process. As Seneca said, “How much better to pursue a straight course and eventually reach that destination where the things that are pleasant and the things that are honorable finally become, for you, the same.”